Atlas - Roberts Alyne - Страница 44
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"Let's dance," I shouted to her over the music.
I didn't even let her try to back out. I grabbed her hand and dragged her into the middle of half-naked bodies grinding on each other. I pushed away the memory of how similar this was to several months ago. The roles were reversed with Liddy trying to cheer me up. We could pretend to be normal girls in their twenties for one night.
The music took control of our bodies. The club was dark, with only flashes of bright, colored lights darting around the room. I only saw flashes of faces and body parts as the heat consumed me. For a second, I thought I saw the one face that haunted my dreams. When I opened my eyes and looked again, it was gone.
Atlas didn't come to me at night anymore, but that didn't stop me from seeing him in the darkness. As much as I tried to be angry and hate him, I never could. He pushed me away when he was done with me, but it didn't change what had happened between us in that lake house. Atlas may have ruined my life, but he saved it, too. I just didn't know how to feel about either of those things.
Hands touched my sides and wrapped around to my stomach. I started to pull away when one large hand pushed on my chest and pinned me against a hard body. My heart pounded against the stranger's palm as I tried to pull away. He didn't back away, instead moving his hand to wrap around my throat.
I froze as warm fingers rested over my racing pulse. A familiar panic washed over me. In the flashing, I couldn't see Liddy and I knew screaming wouldn't do any good. The only thing that made me more uneasy than the person holding me was how it was making me feel. I warmed with the excitement and thrill that Atlas once gave me.
I tilted my head back and gave the stranger more access to my neck. Making myself vulnerable and exposed as my body melted into the one behind me. My eyes closed and I let myself hold on to this feeling for just another second. It had been too long and I may never have this again.
The hand tightened on my neck, making it impossible to breathe. Finally realizing what I was doing, I roughly pulled out of his arms. I spun around, stumbling into a random dancer and tried to search out the man. All I could make out were flashes on body parts and faces. No one even noticed me while I frantically spun in a circle, seeking him out. A hand rested on my shoulder causing me to jump.
Liddy's wide eyes looked back at me. She nodded her head toward the club entrance, looking ready to bail. I nodded and took her hand. Maybe neither one of us were ready for this tonight. Too many monsters haunted us. Too many memories lurked in the darkness.
"Sorry," Liddy said once outside. "I just couldn't do it."
"I understand." I couldn't either.
Back at the apartment, we locked up and went to bed. Both of us were lost in our own memories and thoughts. I was stupid on the dance floor. Instead of running or protecting myself, I got pleasure out of the threat. Frustrated with myself I tore off my dress and left it on the floor, climbing naked into bed.
My hands coasted down my stomach and between my legs. I felt the wetness that wouldn't go away since I had been touched on that dance floor. I wanted so badly to feel the way he used to make me feel. I missed the control he took while making me feel safe at the same time. I wanted to feel completely owned again.
My hands moved on their own as I closed my eyes. I let myself drift to the past in my mind. I pictured his hands on my body and pinching my nipples. I spread my legs wide, pushing my fingers deep and letting out a long moan. I added a third finger, needing more. I always needed more.
My muscles clenched around my fingers as I pushed them deeper inside. I was so lost, I could almost smell him and feel his body heat. One hand left my nipple and I wrapped it around my neck. With gentle pressure, I felt myself soaking my hand as it thrust into my body. In my mind, Atlas was doing this to me. With an image of his face and body over mine, I was so close.
I bit my lip to keep from being too loud. I fucked myself hard, chasing that release I desperately needed. I was close and my back started to lift from the mattress. The pressure on my neck intensified. In my haze, it took a second to realize another hand covered my own. My scream was cut off with the tight squeeze and my eyes shot open.
Dark eyes glared down at me and I combusted inside. I felt myself milking my fingers as I stared into the face that I saw every night when I closed my eyes. I came silently and breathlessly. Atlas glared down at me with a storm of emotions swirling in his eyes.
"Bad girl," he growled in my ear, using his own body to push me into the mattress. "You aren't supposed to come without me."
"Atlas?" I gasped, fighting for enough air. "Are you really here?"
"I am," he said in my ear, releasing the tight hold on my airway. "I tried to stay away."
"Why?"
"Because I am dangerous to you."
My heart was pounding so loud, I almost couldn't hear him. I couldn't catch my breath with the shock and the orgasm. Atlas lowered his body between my legs that were already spread for him and a calmness settled over me.
"You saved me," I told him.
"And you ruined me," he said as he wrestled off his jacket and pants. "You destroyed me. Broke down my defense and got inside my walls."
He took his belt and quickly wrapped it around my wrists. Pinning them above my head, he stared down at my naked and waiting body like a man starved.
"No matter how fucking hard I try, I can't get you out. You manage to do the one thing that can't be undone. You have to deal with the consequences of that now, Little Star."
"What am I paying for?" I moaned as I felt his skin on mine again.
"Making me fall in love with you," he bit out before pushing into me.
Atlas wasted no time, thrusting into me rough and hard like he was punishing me. He tasted everywhere he could reach without releasing my hands. His sucked and nibbled on my neck, biting my ear. Every second spent apart was turned into the power he displayed on my willing body.
"You wanted it at the club," he hissed. "You were aching for it."
"Yes, I was. I wanted it to be you," I told him as I wrapped my legs around his waist.
"Were you thinking about me when you touched yourself?"
"Yes," I shouted, close to another orgasm. "It's always you. I never stopped thinking about you."
"Fuck," he breathed on my skin. "You wrecked me. I can't leave you."
His words were pushing me higher than his relentless thrusts were. He was deeper inside me than ever before and it wasn't just physically.
"Then don't. Keep me. I love you."
I was cut off by my screams and I clamped down around him. Atlas groaned and pumped into me slowly while I fell apart in his arms. Tears streamed down my face and wave after wave of intensity hit me. I felt him pulsing inside me as I slowly spiraled back down. Our sweating and spent bodies clung to each other.
Atlas slowly rose and pulled out of me. Staring down at my face, he pushed the hair out of my eyes.
"I can't let you go."
"You don't need to. I'm yours to keep."
XXXII
Atlas
I was still awake when the sun came up. After taking Stella hard, I gave it to her slow to make up for the marks she would show in the morning. Even in my frustration, anger, and built up hate, Stella was able to handle me. She could always take me at my worst and was probably the only person that ever could. She finally passed out after we showered and I carried her back to the bed.
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